Fallen One

Now before you start calling me a crackpot, hear me out.

 

Kerbs are the biggest evil this world has to fear.

 

When I was a kid I remember the council decided to tarmac  all of the back lanes in the area I live....you tend to notice things like that when you're a kid. Well, because of this eventfilled week of civil engineering festivities I also began to notice that other areas of the town where getting the same kind of treatment.....muddy lanes were becoming freshly tarmaced plazas, derelict land were getting cleaned up, landscaped and pathed, roads in the sleepy villages around the town where getting kerbs in abundance....mmm, lovely I thought to myself and it did indeed look very nice....in the case of the back lanes they were now perfect for skateboarding ....which is another thing you notice when you're a kid.

 

Over the years tho I have realised the evil that it is hidden beneath these innocent looking facades.

 

For starters, those nice new plazas soon became choked with dogshit ....in those days, dogs still roamed the streets in packs. Not wild dogs of course....these were rebel dogs, lol. License evading dogs....anyway the lanes ended up full of crap and smelled like.....well......shit.

 

It's now about 30 years later....and all of those lanes are laced with potholes....dogs no longer roam in packs....now, because of the invention of the lead or leash as they say in the colonies, dogs are civilised and drag along reluctant pet humans behind them who they have specially trained to "scoop the poop".....Not even the apes forced us that low.

 

And the kerbs! I almost forgot about the "kerbs".....see, this is what they do, they make you forget about them.....pure evil.

 

How many countless broken bones have occurred because of "kerbs"? I know of many a broken arm or collar bone that has fractured as a result of a kerb related injury. Why? Because the unfortunate victim forgot it was there.....missed it (they can move) ....or didn't see it (invisibility).

 

All of those nicely kerbed country villages have grown as a result of said kerbs....because a kerb demands a lampost....then a wall.....then a house.....then a factory, speed limits....DOUBLE YELLOW LINES!!.....the list just goes on and on. Urban encroachment....the slow and merciless creep of the sprawl that kerbs grow up to become.

 

Don't believe me? Check out Mt. Fiji on google earth.....at it's base is the borg cube that modern Japan has become as a result of kerbing.

 

Kerbs are pure evil and the root of all the worlds ills......are dogs involved in this invasion? Mm, the bring victims to the kerbs....I'm not exactly up on the stats for dogwalking injuries but I'm guessing that kerbs feature quite high......and potholes no doubt.

 

 

Tear up the kerbs and be free! .....do it! ....do it now!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

go on.....you know you want to.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

no?

I read this report on the UK drug problem earlier on the BBC News website

 

 

"Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said: "We want to see fewer people start using drugs and for our society to be free from the problems caused by drugs."

 

"We want those who do use drugs to enter and finish treatment and move on to lead healthy, drug-free lives. "

 

"We want communities to be free of drug-related crime and we want see tough enforcement of the law."

 

full story http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/7266109.stm

 

 

The Home Secretary went on to say that she also wanted to see Pixies parading down Oxford St handing out free fairy cakes to shoppers and squads of Elves with machine guns patrolling Heathrow and the rooftops of the Houses of Parliament.

 

 

.....OK, she didn't say the last bit but what she did say was equally rediculous.

 

The UK has ALWAYS had social problems from alcohol and drug use...

 

...In the 18th century it was gin, in the Victorian and Edwardian eras it was opium and morphine.....I have also read somewhere that both Queen Victoria and the Queen Mother were cannabis users.

 

There is NO WAY ON EARTH that our society will be drug free! ...FFS they can't even keep HM Prisons drink and drug free.

 

Victorian society was off it's tits on opium when they built the British Empire....most, if not all, of the greatest writers, poets and artists of  the 19th century were addicted to something!

 

It really doesn't suprise me that the century that saw most drugs criminalised also saw the decay of the Empire and the descent of architecture into "monsterous carbunkle" land.

 

Alcohol is the ONLY socially acceptable drug left, and it won't be long before even that's banned as well.

 

When will they realise that banning something only makes it more appealing? (Frankie Say's...remember?)

 

These "problems" will happen regardless of societies wealth and job prospects. Even when the UK has had 100% employment, people still got pissed on the weekends and, those who were inclined to do so, still got high.....even societies that are still in the stone age use some kind of drug whether it's alcohol, leaf derived or even, in some South American tribes, coke on a stick.

 

 

 

There are three absolutes in life

 

1. Every person born will eventually die

2. While men are prepared to pay for sex, women will charge for it in some form or other.

3. People WILL get high or drunk.

 

These things will ALWAYS happen and NOTHING will change that. Even if the payment is a wedding ring or the high is from worshipping an hallucination in a church.

The last part